Tuesday, October 1, 2013

I Can’t Wait To Get Married…..?

I Can’t Wait To Get Married…..This was a statement I would declare to my friends on a daily bases.  How I wanted to have a husband.  I thought marriage would complete me.  I had the list prepared of what he must look like, how he should act, he had to be successful and did I mention love God.  Yes, I had the image of perfection.  Well God shattered my fairytale and called me out on my mess.

As time progressed I started to build a deeper relationship with God.  While doing so God showed me that I didn’t need anything but him to make me whole.  That is when the statement, “I can’t wait to get married”, turned into a question.  I started questioning was I ready to be somebody’s wife.  I started shifting my focus from men to being the woman that would please God rather in a relationship or not. 

A new list was prepared geared towards my character and my flaws.  I made a true vow of celibacy to God (in the past the vow was full of pride and I failed every time).  After making this decision with the right motive in mind God started preparing me for my future; messages on being the woman he wanted me to be.  I had to work on my self-esteem.  Finally I can look in the mirror and say I am beautiful.
My prayers changed from bring me a husband to make me into a great wife if it is his will.  A wife that any man would love to have by their side.  I prayed that people would see God’s character in me.  I want to be use by God.  I want everybody I come in contact with to feel his love.
The time I took out from the dating scene has allowed God to work on me.  I feel I am finally ready to date.  It’s amazing to see God guarding my heart.  For so long I was to blinded with pride.  I kept putting my hands all over it and causing myself pain.  Now that I have bestowed my Trust in him he has stopped the games at the door.  For a while I felt invisible because men weren’t even approaching me.  I now know it was healing process I had to go through.  I’m making sure I am consulting God on every step of this journey.  I am not perfect but striving to hear well done my daughter. 
I am writing this to encourage my sisters and brothers that long for things to complete thing.  The only thing that will make you whole is your relationship with God.  Once you build this relationship your outlook on life will be so different.  You will be content, full of joy and peace no matter what.  Why not surrender your all today.   

1 comment:

  1. Sis, I always love your candor and your insight. Your transparency is inspiring. You are beautiful not only in God's sight but in the sight of all who know and love you. Be Encouraged!

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